Best Geek Ever!: funny names

Showing posts with label funny names. Show all posts

Some Characters with the same name (that coudn't be more different)

One of this guys is asking you to be prepared for a coup. The other is asking you to be prepared to put hair on your horns.

Names are fun. I have proven this several times, when I discussed bad names in games twice. But even good names are fun. Sometimes a name is too good to pass up, and more than one person will name something the same. The disparity between the names is what makes the fun. Observe!
and remember: don't get them confused!

Ultraman

Ultraman is a henshin Superhero in Japan. Capable of growing as high as a skyscraper, his main disadvantage is he can only do so for a limited time.

Ultraman and an enemy debate the quality of Tokyo's streets.

Ultraman is also an evil Superman from another, eviler dimension. He has the same powers as Superman. His only disadvantage is that every other evil Superman has something going for him but him.

Arrowman! Man of Arrows!

Dude at least put on a goatee or something.

Phantom Lady

Phantom Lady is a public domain heroine DC thought it bought, so you can't use her if you haven't the cojones and lawyers to fight them.The daughter of a Senator, she used a sciencey doohickey to blind people and become invisible.

"I thought we'd talked about this, floating device!"

Phantom Lady is also a character on the anime series Angel Blade. The leader of a gang of rapey female mutants, she uses her cartoonishley large breasts to smear milk on most everyone. Oh, forgot to say: This is a porn anime.

I wonder if the Comics Authority would have allowed her self-weaning antics?

DC...you don't have the best one of these.

Catman

Catman is a a Batman villain so bad he once joined a team of villains who felt they wheren't high profile enought. While this "we dont get punched enought by Batman" mentality seems counterintuitive, it is and Catman sucks.

I sleep all day and scratch your shoes...evilly!

Catman is also a golden age hero who was raised by a tigress,Tarzan style. And then he got to America and dressed like a cat and punched criminals and had a teen girl sidekick. It a natural segue.

Enter: THE BELLY SCRATCHER!

Both are orange. Tabbies aren't scary, damn you!

Scarecrow.

Scarecrow is a villain from batman, known for using fear inducing gas on his victim.

Dr Malnitrition was his discarded villain name/theme.

Bus scarecrow is also a villain from Ghost Rider who is known for not being as cool as the other scarecrow. He's a contortionist who can feeds on the fears of men and crows. Scaring crows is actually one of his powers!

"What the...did you just eat my seeds of evil? Aww...man! My dark harvest is RUINED!"

But here comes a new challenger: there is a public domain Scarecrow as well. He outmundanes them all.

Nazi. No powers. Whip and gun. Boooaring!

Some Characters with the same name (that coudn't be more different)

at 9:09 AM

One of this guys is asking you to be prepared for a coup. The other is asking you to be prepared to put hair on your horns.

Ultraman and an enemy debate the quality of Tokyo's streets.

Ultraman is also an evil Superman from another, eviler dimension. He has the same powers as Superman. His only disadvantage is that every other evil Superman has something going for him but him.

Arrowman! Man of Arrows!

"I thought we'd talked about this, floating device!"

I wonder if the Comics Authority would have allowed her self-weaning antics?

DC...you don't have the best one of these.

5 MORE terrible videogame character names

at 11:02 AM


Good old Destiny's child with Beyonce, Kelly and...those other girls. Hmm...

What's in a name? Everything. There is power in naming. A name sets the tone of what people think of you. Good names keep a character memorable. Bad names keep a character derided.

I already told you about bad names, and the characters who sport them. But there's always one(or 5) that get away. Which is why I'm coming back for 5 terribly named characters.

Cream the Rabbit-Sonic the Hedgehog

I like my coffee like I like my Sonic games: by not caring if they has cream or not.

I don't think there is any subtle way to say it, so I'll come right out and shoot: Cream the Rabbit really sounds like someone is requesting for someone else to ejaculate on a rabbit. Now, if Paheal is any indication, many of you do want to cream rabbits. And more power to you, you disturbing fuckos. But if we could disassociate that from little girls as much as possible, I'd be thankful. Though I will still judge.

Dogs Bowser- Blue Stinger

Big on that "Wind" shit.

Sure, the world of Blue Stinger is pretty weird. There's an island called Dinosaur Island, thought there are no dinosaurs in it. There are plenty of crabmutants and elevator music, though.

Our two protagonists are Elliot Ballade and Dogs Bowser. Now, Elliot Ballade is a weird name, but I can't say it's as bad as Dogs simply because it's a family name. I could easily see a family name like Ballade existing. What I can't see is a parent calling it's child "Dogs". Plural Dogs. As a name. Even if he where a Bounty Hunter, his theme would be pretty stupid. "Dogs, the Bounties Hunters!". Pshh. End then there's the elephant in the room about his familly name...

Paavo-Alter Echo

Never seen a man crapping Kirby Krackle?

Alter Echo is a game mostly remembered for it's trippy visuals an shapeshifting platformer gameplay. Also, it's not remembered.

The game's antagonist was a hammy, hammy man named Paavo. Now, I guess this is a common in eastern Europe or something but there are several of us who speak Spanish. For us...this is what Paavo is.

And now I made myself hungry and my sister upset. Thanks, Alter Echo.

That aside, what else can you think about when you think of a name like Paavo? That creepy guy who wore people's faces in Repo? He's the master of making plaster into superweapons and sentient beings. He should be like, Plastero, Plaster of Plastetism!

Kabuki Jo-War Gods

He's trying to become a 'REAL' artist, you know?

Let's face it, War Gods isn't exactly cool name heaven. There's a witch named Pagan and a Voodoo guy named....Voodoo.It's clear they where just winging it.

That said, Kabuki Jo gets the worst of it. The Japanese theater form known as Kabuki has very rarely been associated with good videogames(Kabuki Klash notwithstanding. That game and it's names are awesome), and while War Gods isn't exactly good, Midway still should have known better. Still...Jo? Is it because there's a staff called jō? And the character uses a staff? Or did they wanted to call the character Kabuki JOE? It's terrible either way, just different form of terrible.

Bob-Tekken

Way to cosplay-bait there, Namco.

No. NOOOOO. No-no. N-WO. No.

Bob? Really? When Street Fighter decided to add a fat non-sumo guy, they at least named something that sounds a little like rough. Tekken mad a super-average looking fat guy who looks like he should be fighting cardiac arrest and diabetes if anything and named him...Bob.

Not Bob the Builder, not Bob the Goon, and certainly not Bob, Agent of Hydra. Bob. Goddamn it, Tekken!