Showing posts with label son of a pitch. Show all posts
Showing posts with label son of a pitch. Show all posts

Let's save Interplay!




Intersell


As soon as I heard that Interplay was selling off it's IPs, I got to wondering one thing: What's gonna happen to Wild 9?

Sure, I could see Earthworm Jim being sold for cashmoney to a middle or big sized publisher. Earth Worm Jim isn't gonna be lost forever But what about Wild 9? What about MDK? What about all those other games that didn't have multiple sequels and a cartoon show?


I assume just for his cameo in the PC version of Toshinden is worth half a million.


I don't WANT to wonder. I WONDER when WB is gonna do something with the Ready 2 RumbleThe Grid and  Mace The Dark Age franchises it owns every day. I wonder when Valis is gonna get a new game every night, for the last 9 years.
To be fair, I do can see how the owners of DC, Looney Tunes, Hanna Barbera, Filmation and holders of the license to Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings...would feel a bit incomplete without also owning Dr Muto.

The owners to these IPs bought them, but they don't really HAVE to do anything with them anyway.  And so it could be with the soon to be owners of these games Interplay is selling.

Games like Heart of Darkness.(But I am told this one in particular isn't for sale)

 





Games like like Boogerman.

Games  like Clayfighter.


Games like Carmageddon.



And yes, even friggin' Redneck Rampage.




So I say, instead of speculating about which  company is gonna own and MAAAAYBE use these games, I propose we use crowdfunding to MAKE SURE somebody gets to use this franchise. And that that somebody happens to be EVERYONE IN THE WORLD.

This is the plan: we pool together the money, buy one or more  of these  IP and then release it under a Creative Commons license.  That way, anyone can create a game based on said IP,in any way or shape or form.

But not only a game. You can make a Boogerman Comic, or a Carmageddon Film, should we acquire the rights for the franchise. You can use a song from Clayfighter in your thing. Make an anime from Redneck Rampage: I don't care.
"Shucks , ah shawr dew hope Sempai Itoko will neuteece meh!"

But that would take some money. I mean, I don't know how much some of these is going for, but I can't imagine anything going for less than 10000. So that's the goal I have in my Patreon: Ten thousand dollars to try and buy the rights to any Interplay IP possible.

And remember that it's a bid. Maybe someone REALLY wants to have the rights to Messiah more than us, and is willing to outbid us. So, maybe we'd need amounts of money closer to the millions. I've already got a Patreon set up, so if you wanna help with this, send it there. If you have no money, but want to help, you can always share the link and tell others. I'm gonna be frank: I haven't ever bid on anything and I don't know if you gotta go someplace or something, so any information on that front would be welcome.

If you like the idea, but don't trust me, you are free to get your own Crowdfunding going, maybe towards a specific franchise? I didn't do that, but you could, and I would openly support you. I'm only doing it myself cuz I seem to be the only one who's though of it.

We have to act now, because there may not be another chance. Whoever owns this stuff could very well own it for the rest of your life.

So let's stand together, let's make it happen, let's save Interplay! #SaveInterplay

Son of a Pitch: The Bible Uncut

Jesus, Christ, guys, even the animated movie got Jeff Goldblum as Moses' Brother!

The Internet has been a boon for fan effort. Whereas before lots of legwork and mouth talking was required to get a fan movie going, cans can now access both the technical knoweledge and like minded individuals from across the world.

For example, The Star Wars uncut series is the ultimate letter of love to Star Wars movies. Various people are assigned small parts of Star Wars to recreate, however they can and want.The resulting mishmash of styles, genres, genders and tones is truly a sight to behold.

I think the "uncut" format would be great for another work with lots of fans: The Bible!
Unsurprisingly, there was a remake in 2013
While "Religious films" now a days tend to be lower budget preachfests , there was an era where not only did the idea of making Bible movies as grand, screen filling spectacle was considered   normal, but it profitable enough that at least one filmmaker attempted to get the whole Bible onscreen, in a movie that, accounting for intermission, could eat away a whole day of easter.

But the idea of doing the whole Bible, including every story and subplot and  weird fable about plant races, is an insurmountable challenge for any one person or group. Every King in a 3000 + year dinasty is accounted for by name. Long lines of descendants are described. Allegorical visions are described. Rape happens. Foreskins are cut. Long beards are had. Differing interpretations are rampant. Stories are told, and then retold with differing details. Coats are described as being left behind in letters.

But I think we owe it to ourselves as a society to make the bible as a long form video. It would be beneficial to all. Christians who don't read the Bible would be able to do away with all that pesky reading and simply bask in on the knoweledge of what happens in the Bible, and even those who aren't thrilled by seeing Jesus presented as a robot COULD be inspired to look at their own beliefs beyond  a superficial level. Those who don't believe in the bible or God could at least have some insight on the events as presented beyond "And then they did this, that's totally what happened."
Some stories benefit from context, Mel.
And besides, as one of the oldest compilations of stories and the most read book in the world, having the full bible available as a video would be kind of a big  deal for humanity as a whole. The Bible covers the periods of multiple of the most influential empires in the  preclassic and classic eras. We owe it to ourselves. And it'd be kind of fun.

So what do you say, guys? What parts of the Bible would you call dibs on? And no, you can't pick Song of Songs.


That's spoken for. :)


It wouldn't be as simple as that, though.  While Star Wars has a running time, and scenes, the Bible doen't come with a running time, and if it did it'd probably be huuuge. At least the first books tend to be "The whole lives of people", which  is basically a movie all on it's own. Do we split it according to ammount of chapters, pages? We could get each person to do "what they want" but then we're probably gonna get some parts nobody is going to want to do?  If you are interested in forming part of "The Bible: Uncut" chime in below and tell me, what scenes would you do, and how you would make it, as well as any ideas for divying up the chapters.

My Marvel vs Capcom Spiritual sequel pitch: Text Version.




If you haven´t seen my video, here´s the short version: I can't wait 10 more years for Capcom and Marvel to get together and make a new 3 on 3 player super hero tag team, especially since it's possible Capcom goes under and Marvel is being a jerk about licencing.

So I'm trying to put together a crew of like-minded individuals who want to make a super hero tag team game . We're gonna need composers, drawing artists, people who know about the technical aspects of the game. We're gonna need people who know EF 12, MUGEN, Yoyo Gamemaker, or just plain code.



Now here´s the long written version.

I don´t believe in choosing one´s favorite things without really thinking it. For something to truly be one´s favorite, it must prove itself time and time again. It's the only way to distinguish the passing fads and temporary caprices from what truly hits one's core.

But I think in a sense Marvel vs Capcom 2 has proven itself to be many people´s favorite. It was never a perfect game. The cast came from disparately different games and it showed. The stages weren't anything to write home, and while the 2d sprites that weren't from Darkstalkers looked good, the backgrounds where generic and aged terribly. The music choices are still baffling.

But for a game that basically was a last hurrah for the series collecting all the characters that had been on it, and rounding  it with basically random stragglers(2 Wolverines and Anakaris? Amingo? Where's Anita, U.S. Agent and Shadow Lady? Where the hell is Cyber Akuma? No Warzard characters?) proved itself to have huge legs. For 10 years it was a mainstay of arcades, and the tourney years. 10 years. Halo is over 10 years. Do people still feverishly play Halo's multiplayer?

The known, colorful characters where certainly a plus. The game certainly held a lot of appeal with the promise of making a team with Street Fighter's Bison teaming up with Spider-Man. That's certainly part of it. But it wasn't the only fighting game with Marvel characters.

The success of that game is, at it's core, a design success. The gameplay is fast and accessible, but  with 56 characters to add to a 3 character team, that means that there was bound to be 168 possible teams, which, every character having 3 assist types, raises the possible combinations to 504. Even the update to the sequel couldn't touch it.

Speaking of that, UMVC3 is nearing it's fourth year birthday. Fans of the series where pretty disappointing with Capcom's handling overall of UMVC3 afterwards. The DLC was certainly disappointing/on disk. Capcom seems to have given up on this huge seller pretty quickly. Can't even play it online no more.

The Marvel series is showing all the signs to be headed into an even longer slumber than the decade between MVC2 and MVC3. Capcom is not doing so hot, lately. Don't be surprised if in a couple of years Capcom goes under, or gets bought up or sold.

Meanwhile, Marvel is doing so good, it's decided it to treat it's games division as another subsidiary of the films, focusing on producing games aligned with the movies it's making more than anything. Which is why Activision isn't making X-Men and Spider-Man games anymore.

So, until Marvel's games model goes kaput and Capcom pulls itself out of the muck, the odds of MVC4 are low to nil. And this is where the story used to end, back in the early 2000's.

But it's not the early 2000's anymore. Now, when Microsoft won't release a new Banjo Kazooie game, former Rare staff make a kickstarter for Yooka Laylee. When Konami won't make a traditional Castlevania,  it's original creator puts out a Kickstarter for  Bloodstained. When Capcom won't make a new Megaman game, it's original creator makes Mighty No.9.

So where's our spiritual sequel to Marvel vs Capcom? I mean,  fighting games have some of the more intense fan content generating scenes I've seen, and that's just MUGEN alone! We made Pokken before Pokken was cool. And that's what I'm here to pitch. An idea for us to get together and make a new MVC styled game.




Now, MVC had a pretty deep well of well known  and obscure characters from which to draw. And all those guys are gonna be under copyright for the forseeable future.

But not all superheroes are under copyright. Over the years, hundreds of this heroes have lost their copyright due to their parents companies going under and other such fates.

While you wouldn't mistake any of these guys for anything other than 1940's superheroes in their original state, it's certainly possible to reinvent them as something more modern. Say, analogues to popular current comic book and videogame characters.

For some, you wouldn't even need to go too far. I mean, look at Comet and Spider-Queen.



You're making a fighting game and you're gonna make a moveset for "shoots eyebeams" and "Can shoot web from her wrist." Hello? Streamline the designs a little, and you have some cool chars for a game!

Alas, there's other characters that don't really have that much going for them in terms of powers. A lot of them just have what I call "The Basic Superman". Really strong, Can Fly. A lot of them just have a costume and a gimmick with no actual powers.

But WE'RE calling the shots. We can make this characters do whatever we want! For an example, here's Red Rube.
Also, apparently "Red Rube" is a sexual thing that I don't want to be image googling.

Red Rube is a Captain Marvel(Whom, by the way, can also be on the game) knockoff with no actual powers other than being superstrong and supernaked. Like Captain Marvel, he's an orphan who transforms when he yells out a magic word.  But when he transforms he does a thing with a tornado instead of a thing with lightening.


So why not extrapolate that power set to "he can shoot tornados!" If you wanted him to be an analogue, there's at least two MVC characters with whirlwind powers.


There's all sorts of things that can be done. You can make a legacy character so as to mold the character into whatever age or race or gender you want to. You can pretend the character had a lenghty history to say "hey, that's what the character looked like in the 90's!" or "eventually he got powers" or "He's actually a character from an old videogame, brought to life." We could totally work in those snubbed characters that definitively should have been on there, but whern't.



And that's all before even discussing making an original character. It's certainly a possibility. Jussayin' is all. It's not like we can't make a whole new character or anything.

As for gameplay, may I suggest starting off with a base MVC2 engine, and then improving on that?

For example, add a combo breaker or  somesuch system. Batzarro's personally not  a huge fan of infinites. Or how was that thing in Tatsunoko called? Megacrash?

Another thing I'd like is the ability to choose assist types on the fly. It would add unpredictability to fights to not be expecting something in specific everytime you  see the assist character arrive.

It'd be pretty cool if all  characters could buff up their stats, similar to Juggernaut's Power Up move, with the caveat that it'd drain their meter. You can continually buff on top of the buffs, but it'd keep draining more and more meter. Once you're out of meter, the buffs are gone. We could call this option "Retcon".

Inversely, you could maybe debuff yourself temporarilly in exchange for more meter. Would you be willing to be a bit more frail or slower in exchange for that necessary bit of hyperbar?

There's also non-fighting things that I'd like to improve on the Marvel Games. For example, the story. I'd like to think we can come up with something a little  better than a slideshow for each character(or in MVC2's case, no even that). I mean, it doesn't have to be Mortal Kombat 9's or anything, but even Touki Densho had  somewhat more of a story than a game with characters that have decades of story to them. That's right, Touki Densho. You haven't even heard about that one.

How about endings that acknoweledge that the characters where a team, instead of just giving an ending to the guy who last punched? I know at least MVC1 toyed with that for a bit, but there's certainly more that can be done. 

I was making a fighting game story mode once, and while I couldn't ever finish it, It basically amounted to generic dialogue that could be replaced with character specific versions. You know, you say, for example "What would Ryu say HERE to start a fight? Something like 'I want to test my strength against you' right? But what would Wolverine say? 'Get out of my way, Bub!' probably!" Much like certain parts of Star Wars Kotor, different dialogues basically taking the story in a same direction.

How about Co-Op? The Marvel games completely missed the idea of Co-op, but this isn't 1999 anymore! There's no reason why multiple players can't control each  characters. Hell, can you imagine 3 on 3 gameplay? That would be boss.

In short,I don't think we've done enough with the idea of a super hero tag team game and with fighting games in general. 10 more years? Let's NOT wait 10 more years. Let's get together and do it.






NOT THE FINAL TITLE PLEASE DON'T SUE.

Son of a Pitch: Street Fighter 4 M.U.G.E.N. edition



Wat Stwengt! Bot Dun Fohgut dea many guyslike ew oll over dewowld.




You know, I've always wanted to make a fighting game. You have no idea. And when I first learned of M.U.G.E.N more than 10 years ago, I thought I'd finally be able to. Well, turns out it was a lot more complicated than I'd thought.



Still, I 've always had M.U.G.E.N. in my mind one way or another. It's been kept alive by a community that is as vibrant as it is overzealous, and even the makers of M.U.G.E.N going into Odinsleep couldn't kill the dream. Some truly amazing games and characters have been made by the community. But I think there's been a huge oversight.





Street Fighter IV. I don't think anyone has made stages, or chars of Street Fighter IV. But why? It's got cool characters and It wouldn't be any more work than any other M.U.G.E.N sprite ripped character. Hell, it's be even less, with the small amount of moves and frames the game has. It's just a Nes game for crying out loud!



Wait, you thought I meant THE Street Fighter IV made by Capcom in 2009? Silly me! I should have been more specific. I meant Gouder Co,'s 1993 Bootleg Street Fighter 4 for the NES.


They put the name on the character select screen just to fuck with you.







Mr Gouder must have known that making a fighting game for the NES was a bad idea. The system didn't have the input speed or graphic capabilities for something as complex as a fighting game. However, he must have liked money and facing legal charges for copyright infringement, because he chose to name his game Street Fighter IV, despite Street Fighter III not existing until several years later. I can just imagine being a kid in 1993 that has spent hours with Ryu, Ken and the rest of the gang from Street Fighter 2, suddenly being faced with a game that promises to skip over a whole sequel. However, the game is, unlike the Kart Fighter Nes Bootleg, only barely related to Street Fighter. This Bootleg went all the way, forging new ground into derivative plagiarism.

Shameku...Shoddyuken!






The cast consists of Shoto ripoff Goho Li, and his identical twin Cliff, Playboy Kitty Tracy and her doppleganger Bunny, Buddhist monk Moon and his smirking duplicate Chunfo, Twin Shotos Rober and Pasta, and tough army guys Ranboo and Stanlong.

They ruled out "Cobro", "Racky" and "Stepormamomwilshootyu" early on.








So what am I asking of the M.U.G.E.N. community? To remake a Nes game that had 4 Ryus and a Erin ripoff? Somewhat. I mean, I know you guys like frankenspriting and shotos. Well, how about if instead of making yet another version of Ryu, we frankensprite a new Street Fighter IV? We could figure all new ways to make Pasta different from Rober. I mean, honestly, there's less Shotos in Bootleg SFIV than there where in actual SFIV, and you guys still can't live without that Akuma.


It is dan all over again...




I, as I said, am no good at M.U.G.E.N. At any part of it. And what I learnt is that what the community most needs is coders. Which is part of what I'm terrible at. But maybe, if more than one of us gets their shit together, we can finally bring Tracy back. Who's with me?

Son of a Pitch: Street Fighter 4 M.U.G.E.N. edition



Wat Stwengt! Bot Dun Fohgut dea many guyslike ew oll over dewowld.




You know, I've always wanted to make a fighting game. You have no idea. And when I first learned of M.U.G.E.N more than 10 years ago, I thought I'd finally be able to. Well, turns out it was a lot more complicated than I'd thought.



Still, I 've always had M.U.G.E.N. in my mind one way or another. It's been kept alive by a community that is as vibrant as it is overzealous, and even the makers of M.U.G.E.N going into Odinsleep couldn't kill the dream. Some truly amazing games and characters have been made by the community. But I think there's been a huge oversight.





Street Fighter IV. I don't think anyone has made stages, or chars of Street Fighter IV. But why? It's got cool characters and It wouldn't be any more work than any other M.U.G.E.N sprite ripped character. Hell, it's be even less, with the small amount of moves and frames the game has. It's just a Nes game for crying out loud!



Wait, you thought I meant THE Street Fighter IV made by Capcom in 2009? Silly me! I should have been more specific. I meant Gouder Co,'s 1993 Bootleg Street Fighter 4 for the NES.


They put the name on the character select screen just to fuck with you.



Son of a Pitch: A Mild Mannered Super Hero Game


Super-Sock em!






As I played that awful Batman Game y'all where talking about, a thought started to grow on me: Superheroes videogames still have room to grow.

Sure, we've outgrown summer movie license superhero games universally sucking. We're even past the time a videogame based on Batman just HAD to be terrible. But there's  still aspects of Superheroes that aren't being covered. This is a bit of a general pitch, but it could apply to any number of franchises out there. Or a new one.

First up: why aren't secret identities ever a factor in this games? Hardly ever does a new Superhero story begin in a new comic or a new movie already decked up his or her supersuit. This applies as equally to Batman Begins and Sailor Moon. And you know why? Because even the worst of super hero stories still need to be stories. With identifiable characters. And conflicts that aren't always physical.


But I guess videogames, that have been battling cancer stricken critics for the self imposed and illusory title of "art", can't be stories. They need to be actionous, right? Here, Spider-Man, go punch the Skulls gang so you can learn a lesson about responsibility.

Now, you may balk. What  kind of gameplay would being Peter Parker, or Bruce Wayne or Barry Allen entail? Well, the answer is already among us.


You could have like an adventure game, where you have to figure out how to manage to keep a "real" life while still having to kick the crap out of robots. The Secret Identity parts could be anything, from quick timer events to minigames, to pretty much an RPG type of thing.  The important part is that, instead of throwing players into a sequence of action events, you could get the player involved in the story, with supporting characters and love interests all playing a significantly higher role than expositionary NPCs.
No follow-through, there, web-head.

Picture a huge open city, where on one end is that date with Mary Jane, and on the other, and attack by Mysterio. It'd be like the Sims and  Shenmue all rolled up into one. Only you have to change out of view.

Speaking of which: as long as we're expanding the story, why not give the titular hero a choice of love interests? I mean, most of the known Superhero franchises have at least more than one, and romantic tension is one of those elements of Superheroing that is missing from all this games. You got your Gwen Stacy or your Mary Jane, your Lois or your Lana, your Catwoman or your Talia, your Steve Trevor or...mumblemumblemumbble.

Of course, it doesn't have to be all dates. You could investigate while on civilian mode, so  you can be more prepared to fight the threats. You could engineer better crimefighting tech, if it's Batman or Ironman.  You could maybe try and work as a typical newspaper.

Another avenue that isn't often explored is  choice. But I guess in Superhero games it's kind of hard to put in that "light side", dark side" bar you think I mean by "choice". No, what I mean is that, several of this characters have been through enough phases that you could easily assign them a type of reaction. Let's take Batman, trying to defeat a warehouse full of goons. You could have the "Ninja master of the night" approach. You could have the "drop out of a skylight"  and announce yourself approach. You could even have the "gun them down" approach.  Maybe each type of approach could earn you points towards being more Silver Age, or more current age or more Issue 1 Batman. This eventually morphing the  character or the world more to reflect that. Sort of like the original, crazy promises of Fable. 

I don't want all this to be misconstrued as saying I don't like  action superhero games. I do. But at the same time, with the focus on story that games like L.A. Noire and Heavy Rain have proven can actually move units, why can't we have something like that on other games? The superhero fantasy is more that just punching and huge chins and brass heavy orchestra. Surely such a project would take a lot to get right and on time and to sell. But if done right, it could be the greatest superhero game in history and up the bar.

Son of a Pitch: A Mild Mannered Super Hero Game


Super-Sock em!






As I played that awful Batman Game y'all where talking about, a thought started to grow on me: Superheroes videogames still have room to grow.

Sure, we've outgrown summer movie license superhero games universally sucking. We're even past the time a videogame based on Batman just HAD to be terrible. But there's  still aspects of Superheroes that aren't being covered. This is a bit of a general pitch, but it could apply to any number of franchises out there. Or a new one.

First up: why aren't secret identities ever a factor in this games? Hardly ever does a new Superhero story begin in a new comic or a new movie already decked up his or her supersuit. This applies as equally to Batman Begins and Sailor Moon. And you know why? Because even the worst of super hero stories still need to be stories. With identifiable characters. And conflicts that aren't always physical.

Son of a Pitch: Star Wars (2014)




It's on Green screen, 'course I can.

Well, it seems several of the changes for that newfangled Home Hexilogy Star Wars rerelease are out and...it's pretty disconcerting. To me, this one right here stands out.

Yes, that is Obi Wan imitating a dragon to scare away the Sand people. When my neighbor gets home drunk, he has to scare Sandpeople all the time, I guess.

You see, (puts on old man glasses) It used to be you released a movie, and it was done. However, we all know many ideas and concepts and scenes don't make it into the final product. The advent of Home Video formats allowed the existence of "The Director's Cut",  the idea of adding scenes that where cut to presumably approach the film more to the director's vision. Even if that vision is a little stupid, I get that.

However, George Lucas isn't a normal director. Despite having some great, classic movies that he could just send into the Blue Ray Making machine and watch the money fly, he just can't help himself going back and reworking this films.

Imagine if Brian De Palma came back after a couple of decades and decided he was gonna add a cg cat for Tony and re-dub his death scene to have him go "I regret nothing!" as he fell into the pool. You could say he CAN, but you could say also that it's fuckin' stupid. This things are additions in the technical sense of the word only, and do not actually upgrade the experience for the audience. 



"I mean, he's missing that "Dr Claw" edge to him..."

This isn't a matter if the changes are good or bad for the film. It's a question of who this changes are for. I mean, Star Wars was pretty popular before he put CG in it in the 90s. I don't think it's just about money, because I don't think there are enough fans of blinking to justify putting eyelids on 40 year old film's dudes in fursuits.  You could release licensed Star Wars Turdburgers and people would buy. It's clearly a personal thing for old George.

So here's my pitch to the thick necked one himself: Why not redo the whole thing over again? Why not restart the whole franchise? That's right, I'm calling for a Star Wars REMAKE.



Clearly.

George Lucas gets to do whatever he wants with this, from turning Chew Bacca and Han Solo into a Lemur and a Reptile, as per his original vision, to making  EVERYTHING in CG from scratch. George get full control of the franchise from frame 1.  He can start with Star Wars: A New Hope, and move through all 6 movies. It's not like he's not changing the Prequels, in spite him being in full control of those, too. He can make pack every single granule of the screen with zipping, swooping, bouncing, jumping computer effects. With super panamorphic 3D reberwatshit and shit.



Panaamorphic!

He can put Jonah Hill as Luke and have an extended, unnecessary fight with Greedo in the original film instead of just a tense scene! He can have Jabba be 3 stories high and terrorize Seattle! He can establish how germs rule they universe and control destiny and cause prophesies from the start, now!

And invariable, when a movie is remade, the original goes out on Disc, so maybe we can get the regular old Star Wars movies on home video formats? Hmm?


Son of a Pitch: Star Wars (2014)

It's on Green screen, 'course I can.

Well, it seems several of the changes for that newfangled Home Hexilogy Star Wars rerelease are out and...it's pretty disconcerting. To me, this one right here stands out.

Yes, that is Obi Wan imitating a dragon to scare away the Sand people. When my neighbor gets home drunk, he has to scare Sandpeople all the time, I guess.

You see, (puts on old man glasses) It used to be you released a movie, and it was done. However, we all know many ideas and concepts and scenes don't make it into the final product. The advent of Home Video formats allowed the existence of "The Director's Cut",  the idea of adding scenes that where cut to presumably approach the film more to the director's vision. Even if that vision is a little stupid, I get that.

However, George Lucas isn't a normal director. Despite having some great, classic movies that he could just send into the Blue Ray Making machine and watch the money fly, he just can't help himself going back and reworking this films.

Imagine if Brian De Palma came back after a couple of decades and decided he was gonna add a cg cat for Tony and re-dub his death scene to have him go "I regret nothing!" as he fell into the pool. You could say he CAN, but you could say also that it's fuckin' stupid. This things are additions in the technical sense of the word only, and do not actually upgrade the experience for the audience. 
"I mean, he's missing that "Dr Claw" edge to him..."

This isn't a matter if the changes are good or bad for the film. It's a question of who this changes are for. I mean, Star Wars was pretty popular before he put CG in it in the 90s. I don't think it's just about money, because I don't think there are enough fans of blinking to justify putting eyelids on 40 year old film's dudes in fursuits.  You could release licensed Star Wars Turdburgers and people would buy. It's clearly a personal thing for old George.

So here's my pitch to the thick necked one himself: Why not redo the whole thing over again? Why not restart the whole franchise? That's right, I'm calling for a Star Wars REMAKE.
Clearly.

George Lucas gets to do whatever he wants with this, from turning Chew Bacca and Han Solo into a Lemur and a Reptile, as per his original vision, to making  EVERYTHING in CG from scratch. George get full control of the franchise from frame 1.  He can start with Star Wars: A New Hope, and move through all 6 movies. It's not like he's not changing the Prequels, in spite him being in full control of those, too. He can make pack every single granule of the screen with zipping, swooping, bouncing, jumping computer effects. With super panamorphic 3D reberwatshit and shit.
Panaamorphic!

He can put Jonah Hill as Luke and have an extended, unnecessary fight with Greedo in the original film instead of just a tense scene! He can have Jabba be 3 stories high and terrorize Seattle! He can establish how germs rule they universe and control destiny and cause prophesies from the start, now!

And invariable, when a movie is remade, the original goes out on Disc, so maybe we can get the regular old Star Wars movies on home video formats? Hmm?


What are you guys watching?