Catwoman's Cancelled Movie, De-scripted! Part Dos! at 5:13 PM

Guess who's back? Back again? Captain God is back! Tell your friends! Yes, it's the return of the series 20 years in the making where I go over Catwoman, not as it happened, but as it could have!

Though I deeply regret not having put more graphics on it, I sincerely hope you enjoy it!

Game Kata: Batman Forever at 1:51 PM

CINEFUSION!

When I started on this Innernet shet, I was under the understanding that, whatever I could come up with, somebody had probably already done it, but harder and faster than me, you know? I mean,  you got thousands of people out there obsessing over the same stuff as you: invariably somebody's bound to have had the same idea.

That's why this blog is focused on obscure stuff and not spur of the moment "Disney just announce SOMETHING" type news regurgitation. You can't out-Io9 Io9, you know?

But I guess I was wrong. You see, I am doing research on fighitng game special moves for a project. The project is a fighting game and the research is ripping off  every cool special move out there.

So naturally I set out to look for compilations of special moves. I mean, surely there has to be a lot of those.

Except there aren't. There's  quite a bit hyper or super move compilations for the games that do have those, sometimes confusingly calling those special moves, because I don't know.

I want to look at Shaq Fu's and Time Killer's special moves without, you know, playing those awful games. That so hard?

And so, Batzarro brings YOU...Game Kata. Where I show you all the special moves in a fighting game. For research and archival purposes.



In our first episode...not a fighting game. Batman Forever certainly felt like a fighting game, specifically Mortal Kombat. However, there IS  a training/vs mode that let's players duke it out not only as Batman and Robin, but also as most enemies from the game. I want to thank Vortexspin for putting the guide online, although some of the moves were wrong and others were missing. Be sure to let me know about how I "forgot" about them and playing as Sugar, too. I also "forgot" about Riddler, be sure to let me know! How forgetful I can be.

As for Batman and Robin, their video will be separate. They had their pick of gadgets, which were used with special move motions.  I probably need a whole video just to trying out the different gatgets.

So when it comes to ripping off moves, I think Riddler Thug's delayed acid drip and Thug 2's spikes version are pretty original and interesting, and seem good to set up a trap for a player.  And RThug's black hole attack seems pretty neat, although in this game it doesn't seem to be as deadly as it could be.


On the other end of things Spice's flying kick is damn near useless because of collission issues, and an opponent would need to be damn well stationary to get hit by it. Thug 1's pin move probably can't help if you aren't playing co-op.


The idea of 2 Face having different moves depending on which side he's facing seems interesting. But the moves are so dissimilar that it's more confusing than anything.  And the way Thug 1 uses  a chainsaw as a motorcycle and a gun is only slightly less hilarious than the way he uses it to castrate his opponent.

Overall, this mode of play in this game is an interesting addition, as the adventure parts of the game are pretty terrible. However, it is not fleshed out enough, and such an afterthought that it's practically hidden from players. Player 1 can't play as Robin or Sugar, and similarly P2 can't play as Batman or Spice. If it had been treated as a fully fledged multiplayer vs mode, and not as training  for the awful single player experience, it might me more noteworthy. These guys obviously wanted to make a fighting game, I don't see why didn't just do that, instead of making a half-hearted precursor to Mortal Kombat Mythologies.

Adam Ruins Everything says it better than me at 6:22 AM

Sometimes you can't say it better than it's already been said. So in an effort to educate my readers regarding copyright, I'm delegating the task to Adam, of Ruining Everything fame, to put into voice what I've been trying to say in text for a while. Please, check him out at TruTv's channel, and  tell him BGE sent you.

Catwoman's Cancelled Movie, De-scripted! at 11:30 AM

Catwoman, uncharacteristically freeing a pair of puppies.

This has been a long time coming, but the first in my four part series of Videoblogs describing the script from a Catwoman movie that never was. Click and watch.Watch and like. Like and Subscribe!

It took me a bit of time to get the whole thing together, including  going through as much as 3 microphones,  and it was basically a year. This one was recorded with microphone 2, so it's going to be a bit lower in quality compared to the upcoming episodes.

In this episode, Catwoman goes to a town just outside Gotham and finds Superheroes you'll never ever guess! But anyway, let me leave you with a teaser.

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Son of a Pitch: The Bible Uncut at 5:20 AM

Jesus, Christ, guys, even the animated movie got Jeff Goldblum as Moses' Brother!

The Internet has been a boon for fan effort. Whereas before lots of legwork and mouth talking was required to get a fan movie going, cans can now access both the technical knoweledge and like minded individuals from across the world.

For example, The Star Wars uncut series is the ultimate letter of love to Star Wars movies. Various people are assigned small parts of Star Wars to recreate, however they can and want.The resulting mishmash of styles, genres, genders and tones is truly a sight to behold.

I think the "uncut" format would be great for another work with lots of fans: The Bible!

Unsurprisingly, there was a remake in 2013

While "Religious films" now a days tend to be lower budget preachfests , there was an era where not only did the idea of making Bible movies as grand, screen filling spectacle was considered   normal, but it profitable enough that at least one filmmaker attempted to get the whole Bible onscreen, in a movie that, accounting for intermission, could eat away a whole day of easter.

But the idea of doing the whole Bible, including every story and subplot and  weird fable about plant races, is an insurmountable challenge for any one person or group. Every King in a 3000 + year dinasty is accounted for by name. Long lines of descendants are described. Allegorical visions are described. Rape happens. Foreskins are cut. Long beards are had. Differing interpretations are rampant. Stories are told, and then retold with differing details. Coats are described as being left behind in letters.

But I think we owe it to ourselves as a society to make the bible as a long form video. It would be beneficial to all. Christians who don't read the Bible would be able to do away with all that pesky reading and simply bask in on the knoweledge of what happens in the Bible, and even those who aren't thrilled by seeing Jesus presented as a robot COULD be inspired to look at their own beliefs beyond  a superficial level. Those who don't believe in the bible or God could at least have some insight on the events as presented beyond "And then they did this, that's totally what happened."

Some stories benefit from context, Mel.

And besides, as one of the oldest compilations of stories and the most read book in the world, having the full bible available as a video would be kind of a big  deal for humanity as a whole. The Bible covers the periods of multiple of the most influential empires in the  preclassic and classic eras. We owe it to ourselves. And it'd be kind of fun.

So what do you say, guys? What parts of the Bible would you call dibs on? And no, you can't pick Song of Songs.


That's spoken for. :)


It wouldn't be as simple as that, though.  While Star Wars has a running time, and scenes, the Bible doen't come with a running time, and if it did it'd probably be huuuge. At least the first books tend to be "The whole lives of people", which  is basically a movie all on it's own. Do we split it according to ammount of chapters, pages? We could get each person to do "what they want" but then we're probably gonna get some parts nobody is going to want to do?  If you are interested in forming part of "The Bible: Uncut" chime in below and tell me, what scenes would you do, and how you would make it, as well as any ideas for divying up the chapters.

The Cat's Mew! at 7:17 PM

If you're like me, you know exactly what this is. You where there. This is some of your earliest memories of an adventure on the big screen. And you remember that, at the end of Batman Returns, Catwoman had given Batman the slip.

But in the following 2 movies, Catwoman's fate went unmentioned.  Have you ever wondered what happened to her? Where did she go?  What did she do?

It's silly. You know that what happened was that it's just a movie. Catwoman didn't go anywhere. Michelle Pfeifer did some movies,  and the costume probably stayed in some vault and got sold on Ebay once that became a thing.

But what if I told you there WAS an official story of what Selina Kyle's life after her apparent death? What if I told you there was a story where she went to another town, and met other people, and became Catwoman again?  You'd like that, wouldn't you?

Coming this December, Bestgeekeverpr presents a look at a script for  a Catwoman movie.  A video series detailing exactly what DC planned for the character's film...21 years ago!  Prepare yourselves, because I'm letting the cat out of the bag!

Why am I making a Gamejam, again? at 1:17 PM

I deliniate the reasons I'm making a Gamejam next year, in my best "Joker-interrupts-tv"style creepy video. Also, the Jam is online, now.