Wakanda is America? Big Red Circle Take at 11:47 AM

Mr Saturday Movies they call me.

Allegory is hard. Just ask that movie about how Black people are discriminated against because they sided with The Dark Lord 2000 years ago, and that is also why Jews run the world.

But political messages are hard, yo know, in a general sense. I mean, if you say maybe government should butt out of your ghost busting business, obviously people who don't agree might sour on your story, and if you say perhaps , that society may be better overall if men can finally learn to express ourselves and not follow a line of thinking in which you create a terrorist group, some people might read it as "yeah, I should totally create a terrorist group! This line of thinking is great!"

So, when Black Panther started getting positive word of mouth, and positive perception in the Black and Not-Fucking-Racist demographics, some...Fine People...decided to get out ahead on it. Knowing that "Aaaaah! The Blacks!" doesn't work as well as it used to, they tried a little  Aikido: to say that Wakanda is, in fact, a place after their own heart. Wakanda is Alt-Right, even, according to them.

After all, a quick reading of the Wikipedia for Wakanda, the fictional African nation that Black Panther inhabits,  you can see the resemblance. It is Isolationist, arguably an Ethnostate. Many even critiqued how it was an advanced and resource rich place that didn't help the sorrounding countries.

But the writers and director seemed to have gotten even more ahead of said critiques. Spoilers for Black Panther follow.

But you're knee deep into my thinkpiece, you know? You had to decide that earlier.

Wakanda being isolationist and not helping the world, especially not helping the beat up continent that is it's home, is not only addressed in the story, it IS the damn story.

"Time for some White Genocide up in this piece.  Turn Lara Croft  into a Black!"

King T'Challa, fresh off fighting a fanfic character in a story vaguely based on a story by Mark Milar, is the newly minted king of Wakanda after his father is killed. But unknown to him the villains Killmonger and Ulyses Klau have designs to destroy him. Klau is notorious for sneaking into Wakanda to steal vibranium, the miracle metal that powers this civilization, for Killmonger's father, a Wakandan spy that meant to use the technology to right the wrongs the White People have done on, whom the dead king killed in the confrontation. Killmonger grew bitter at his father's death and at, well, knowing he deserved more than to be a poor Black boy in America.

Wakanda faces immediate criticism from Nakia, Black Panther's also spy love interest, as well as BP's best friend who really wants revenge on Klau. The Jabari Tribe, who seem to be sort of outcasts within the enclave, also  have grievances with the way things are run.

Eventually, Killmonger defeats BP in ritual combat, claiming for himself the throne and immediately launching of into an even more extreme, more advanced  version of  his father plans, a full on invasion of the world using the advanced technology.  And  he also quickly proves that he's not gonna be a nice king either.

After Killmonger is defeated,  and an enormous civil war is ended, T'Challa opens the doors of Wakanda to all (Black?) outsiders, and begins using it's resources to help the world.

You see, what many, on both sides of the racism side, assumed was that because this was a fantasy movie set in fantasy Africa made by an African American  director, that Wakanda was here to answer the question if a Wakanda would be good, and answer it with a resounding yes.

If you assumed that and also where a huge racist trying to gain Nazi points for harshing everyone's mellow, it makes sense you would also be able to do so by pointing out a Wakanda would be bad. But Wakanda was not a statement on Wakanda itself. Wakanda is America.

A prosperous  yet flawed place ruled by people who want to do the right thing, which is not easy because there is no agreement on the right thing. Do they  get involved and risk the consequences? Do they just stay put and look out for those within?

It even has a dumb way of choosing it's leader!

 And the movie seemingly comes down with "get involved but to help, not to bully everyone." The movies main plot eventually comes down to Killmonger, who is a creation of both Wakanda's involvement and (mostly) it's apathy towards the rest of the world. To say that America's involvement and (mostly) it's apathy toward the rest of the world has created some of it's enemies is an understatement.

Killmonger's entire plan to use the country's vast resources to "fix" the world, a world that, for the record, really IS that messed up, is in essence wrong not because what he sets out to do is wrong, but because it represents the violent kind of interventionism that always further complicates matters and hurts more people in the long run, Wakanda's own invasion of Iraq.

In the end Wakanda's main sin was to leave people "out there" and not help them, and it boomerangs back to them in the form of one of those persons they left behind.

While some of y'all where asking why the most prosperous, technologically advanced country in the world wasn't helping those in need around the world, taking in refugees, sharing it's resources,  the movie was saying "well, why aren't you?"

But maybe that's just my interpretation.

Highway to Hell at 8:05 AM

Trumpverse #4 : Closing Sessions at 6:15 PM

So what a month, huh? Obama accused of spying on Trump, the connections between Russia and Trump becoming ever clearer, Russian Ambassadors turning up all dead and  Trump ALMOST  ingratiating himself with the media because he managed to talk near normally for an evening. Never a dull moment in the Trumpverse. So here go some of  the thoughts that flew around this month.

Trumpverse #3 Treason Season at 6:05 AM

Things are quite shaken here in the Trumpverse, but sadly a lot of it won't be reflected in this, because while I mean for these to come out in the 11th of the month my HDMI Cable died on me, as it happens.
But what a world huh?  In less than a month Trumpy  tried to overreach his constitutional limits,  showed his dinner guests  documents regarding Nuclear Armament, pissed off our allies and emboldened our enemies. Can he make it to 2020?

Can WE?  It's not yet the 4rth week and every single aspect of Trump's version of America is worst than what we had. Thankfully  big clouds of  impeachment are hovering over  this accursed administration.  It cannot happen soon enough. #Resist

Trumpverse #2 Wee The People at 6:27 AM

 Welcome to the second installment of  Trumpverse, my attempt to piece together the FEELING of such a time when America...or at least  a small part of it, chose what seemed to be the least qualified and least ethical person as it's worldwide face(who was also broadly connected to the Russian government and everything), from headlines and people's comments.

Why do this? Well, I don't want some jackass historian to later say that people where mesmerized with Trump's message and had no idea what was going to happen. Yes, a significant amount of people were, and large enough for the Electoral college to allow this travesty to go on. But don't you dare say we where fucking all hypnotized!

And yes, the Pro-Trump's people's words are here too. I want you guys to remember what you thought you were getting, and contrasting  with what you're getting.

Dick Move, America at 6:06 PM

Hello,  and welcome to thinkpiece #34457864845 basically asking, you know, What the hell happened?

It's over...it's all over.

We had all pretty much assumed after Donald Trump openly admitted on an open mic to  the inappropriate sexual conduct he'd been accused off for years(and for which his trial is still ongoing), that he'd mostly lose this election. It was a bit silly that that was the thing that was gonna do him in, after his incredibly poor displays on just about every issue a President should face.

And instead he won. He won despite running like he wanted to lose. Despite offending pretty much everyone on every side of the aisle, and saying things that would have gotten other politicians to lose  many many times,  he won.


I would not be surprised if  every single person who voted for Donald Trump did harbor  racist, Islamophobic, and so and so feelings and that that was the reason they voted for him. But that's not even  why I'm shocked. I'm shocked that none of you lot who voted for him realized how impractical, if not outright impossible, the fake ideas Donald Trump used to sell his campaign are.


A giant concrete wall would be incredibly expensive for something  coyotes would merely tunnel under. Rounding up and deporting Muslims would also be something that is incredibly expensive, with very little actual payoff in security terms.

I kind of get it that some of you liked him because he wasn't a normal politician. Because he was different, more so than because he seemed imbibed with the very spirit of douchbaggery itself. But different isn't  always good. You know what would be real different? Sticking a flaming  pine cone up my  anus while headbutting a porcupine. It would probably make history as the first time anyone's ever done that, but that doesn't mean it wouldn't be a painful, terrible idea with huge consequences.

You see, I thought you would see through this obvious bullshit even through your racism and hate. I kinda had what you'd call  "faith". I had faith on you too see what it is for what it is. I had faith on America, you could say. Ha!

Because even if Donald Trump's terrible ideas are just that, ideas that won't come to fruition, then what else is there?  He's gonna be naming judges, heads of agencies and members of the Fiscal Control Board. He's gonna be signing or rejecting bills from other, more capable people. Mr Celebrity Apprentice will be representing your country now, and we don't even know what his stances are because he's made more flip flops than a  Taiwanese sweatshop worker.


I mean, how could you ever believe that the golden throne having businessman who started off by inheriting money from his father was going to be the one standing up to big interests in Washington? Like, you really thought that? You really think a corrupt businessman ran for President because he wanted to put a stop to corrupt businessmen? This isn't just putting a fox to guard a hen-house, you're actively sticking your chickens inside a fox.

So here's to you naive people who put this obvious snake oil salesman on the highest office in the land.  You just made a big mistake. A huge mistake. The worst mistake, it is tremendous. You guys literally don't know what you have done. And a special shout-out to those of you who didn't vote because "both candidates are just as bad". Those of us that can't vote will now suffer for your myopic attitude and stupidity. Even the people who were racists voting for Donald Trump I respect more than you, because at least THEY took the idea of choosing a leader seriously. More than them, more than Clinton and Wasserman Shultz, more than the misguided conservatives who got this cartoon villain to win the primaries, it is YOU I blame for whatever happens next. It was a time for action, and you chose inaction. You chose unwisely.

And Donald Trump? Congratulations. You played this country like an harp from hell. I hope you enjoy the ego stroke that comes from this. The expectations are really low, so if you play your cards right and don't break too many things, you might be remembered as not-the-worst-president-in-history.

But then again, that's the kind of lack of cynicism that led me to believe that you wouldn't even make it in.  I wonder how good it feels to be the winner when your victory worries everyone.

So what's next? We're all disappointing in the system that allowed this. We're all tired and sad and angry.What are we gonna do, move to Canada?

Not me, though, I'mma get myself back to the Madre Patria if anything.

Well, no, stupid. What inaction wrought inaction won't dissolve. Now is the time to REALLY get involved with politics! Like, for really, real! In two years, there will be another vote. Not a sexy Presidential vote, but a vote nonetheless. A vote that can make a difference, if you let it. Like a great man said, you can't undo that, but you can diminish the effects of it. And he should know about putting annoying orange creatures where they don't belong.

 Don't wait for the news to tell you to start worrying about it to start worrying about it.  Pressure your congressmen. Don't let them pass the kinds of laws that Donald Trump promised.

They say evil wins when good men do nothing. I think we've seen that upfront by now. The question is, are you ready to do something?

Open letter to Congress at 8:42 AM

The Fiscal Control Board's congressional task force has sent out a request to see what people think are some of the issues in Puerto Rico that ought to be tackled. Because in Congress, even a task force has it's own  task force, I guess.

Rather than tell them "vayanse al carajo canto de mama bicho hijo de la gran puta pendejo"  and all those raw Puerto Rican feelings I have about it all, I made an orderly letter. It is as follows.



Oh, now. NOW you want to know what we think. You spent months putting P.R.O.M.E.S.A in place, and only in the end do you think that maybe the people who are going to be under this dictatorial board ideated by an enviromental subcomitee might have some insight to this whole thing?

Sigh. Lucky for you, I am a blogger, so I'm already used to doling out words that will never be read, and even if read won't be heeded. Here's some things that could boost our economy. So instead of wasting time telling you what you are, here's some key areas to boost the economy.

The 936 laws that were removed basically killed our economy. So the most obvious thing to do is put them(or something similar) back in place.
The Marine Merchant laws that used to apply to Puerto Rico but suddenly didn't, could also be changed.

The single public electric company's corruption somehow bankrupted a monopoly. The high cost of power in the island is one of the things that makes having a business harder.  The sad truth is it must be opened to competition.

Tourism is a potential revenue source for the island, but currently  the island's tourism is centered in the island's capital San Juan, when there's plenty to see in the rest of the island. De-centralize tourism. This should have been  done years ago, but it wasn't.

Corruption is certainly an issue, as I'm sure some others will tell you. Cronyism, contracts to friends in government, divertion of public funds, and other nastinesses has permeated the local government and become basically acceptable. While I don't believe the Fiscal Control Board is here to do that, It IS something that should be changed.

The island's political status is at the heart of it all. While the local parties all have wild dreams of the benefits of state hood and independence, it is undeniable that being yoked by congress is the source of the major problems in Puerto Rico's economy and government. To be, or not to be, is the question.

So there you have it.

P.R.O.M.E.S.A. has killed all my faith in America. You moved us from 2nd class citizens to third class citizens. It attempts to solve problems that are rooted in colonialism with more colonialism. You hurt us. This hurts.

In a few years we will see what an unnacountable group of people can do for an island they know nothing about. Some of them may even be chosen by Mr Celebrity Apprentice! And in those days, if any of you is capable of feeling shame, you should apologize.

You too, can tell Congress to suck your bicho here.

Democracy is dead, the bad guys won, buy my shirts at 7:18 PM

No hay mar. No hay sol.

So...how about that Fiscal Control Board, huh?  It passed through and the president signed it and everything, and people who  expressed themselves against it such as Lin Manuel Marin Miranda and our Governor, suddenly decided it was the only choice.

Funny, I was reading about the Japanese Internment Camps, you know, when they rounded all the Japanese into shitty desert camp prisons because of fear they might sabotage stuff. Obviously there was a strong sense then that there was an emergency and that measures  had to be taken.

It's not good that they did that, but it's not surprising. What is surprising is that even today you see some people saying, that we had to. Despite evidence only piling up for the fact that we did it, they describe ambiguous consequences if we hadn't gone with it.

We had to. We had to violate the human rights of an entire group of people to ease our fears. We had to use nukes on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. We had to hold those McCarthy hearings. We had to intervene in Vietnam and Korea. We had to install dictators in various countries. We had to arm insurgents in Afghanistan. We had to invade Afghanistan. And Iraq. We had to create the Patriot Act. We had to torture people for information. We had to collect information on everyday American Citizens. We have to use Drones to kill people in other countries. Or is it only in other countries?

The phrase "necessary evil" operates from a view point where you regret evil done. You actually HAD to  do it, as the consequences showed themselves far greater than inaction. But when all evils are necessary and there's no line, that's another thing.


I don't believe that P.R.O.M.E.S.A. was "The ONLY WAY" anymore than putting  Japanese folks into inhuman camps during the 1940s was "THE ONLY WAY" to keep Japanese saboteurs from wreaking havoc and costing U.S. the war, installing dictators and accusing random folks  was "THE ONLY WAY" America could beat back the Soviets, and the same way collecting your information and blowing up foreigners with unaccountable death-machines is "THE ONLY WAY"  to keep the specter of terrorism at bay.

But it doesn't matter what I believe. The President doesn't have to listen to me: they don't let us vote for President. Congress doesn't have to listen to me, I don't have representation in there. One day the full truth will come out and we will truly see if we actually HAD to, or if we just WANTED TO.

So...I'm making some T-Shirts.  They show a darkened Puerto Rican flag, flagrantly  riding the coattails of this thing that's been making news rounds. There's a lot of dissatisfaction... and I want to turn it into di$$ati$faction.

"Hey, our flag is going into people's asses and being stepped on as we speak, but it's the correct colors as it happens!

Get your darkened  Monoestrellada shirts for men and women and show everyone that you are sad about Puerto Rico...Or Cuba. Once you remove the colors it could go either way, really.

I will  update as I make even more designs. And...please don't vote for Donald Trump. As long as we're gonna have a tyrannical colonial dictatorship, it might as well not be chosen by the Guy from Celebrity Apprentice. You guys are killing us over here.

Best Geek Ever is against P.R.O.M.E.S.A. at 9:15 PM

Yeah, boy! Trample them liberties!

Hello. I am Gabriel Ramirez, also called Batzarro. I run a small blog

called Bestgeekeverpr.blogspot.com . I am a Puerto Rican, I live in Puerto

Rico, and I stand for Puerto Rico.

For those of you that don't know, congress and President Obama are just

about to sign act HR 4900 known as P.R.O.M.E.S.A., which would establish a

Fiscal Control Board over the America owned territory of Puerto Rico. This

as a result of the crushing debt our small island has racked up in over 30

years of bad administration after bad administration.

Our relationship with the U.S. has never been one of equals. After we were

taken in as war booty in the Spanish American Wars we spent decades under

military occupation.

And look, frankly sometimes the stuff you do gives us cancer.

Later, the Island was declared an Estado Libre Asociado, or free

associated state.  The only true part about that title is that we were

associated, because we are not a state on any definition of the word, and all our laws can be revoked by

congress, under which we remain.

So, when we run into a huge fiscal crisis created by our lack of self

governance, you would expect this very congress to step in. Or step up.

But instead they step on. On us.

So here's the plan the Subcomitee For Natural Resources came up with. You

heard right, the enormous fiscal and political crisis we face was

spearheaded by a Natural Resources group. This isn't a goddamn oil spill!

Were was I? Yes, the plan. So they will establish a board that will be

making all the financial decisions from now on. This board will be mostly

handpicked by the President, it will not answer to the people of Puerto

Rico at all, they are completely unaccountable for anything that happens,

and they can freely recieve gifts. They will have the power to overturn

laws, create laws, and arrest anyone who refuses to cooperate with their

making of said laws. And they can do all that secretly and behind closed doors because why tha fack nat?

Now, let's take this point by point.

* Having an unnacountable board have this much power is bad. It's kind of

the opposite of democracy. It's like a dictatorship, or rather since this

is a board created by a foreign dignitary, a colony.

* To give an unnacountable group this much power could lead to ridiculous

ammounts of corruption. I mean, legally, I could go to the FCB members and

 tell them to sell me half  the island in exchange for  a box of

tangerines, and they would face no risk. They'd have to be kind of

incredibly good or incredibly dumb NOT to start accepting bribes openly.

Also, quick reminder, THIS guy may soon be the one naming such said authoritarian group.

*It's highly troubling that this group doesn't take any responsibility for

 what they do. The actions of this group could lead to loss of life,

liberty and material goods. Actions of austerity are what lead to the town

of Flint getting poisoned with lead. And this isn't a small town we're

talking about. 3.5 million people live here!

In fact, in theory, these assholes could make our debt worst, and run off

laughing, and we'd be left holding the broken pieces.

* The plan to reduce the minimum wage is heart rending, and the fact that this was put in as if this was an obvious economy boosting title makes me want to hang myself. To put this

on perspective, I tried to buy the materials for a breakfast with the

proposed minimum wage.

 And for the record , this minimum wage doesn't

count what they take away for taxes and social security.

You expect young people to live off of this crap? I mean, I couldn't

afford housing with full time minimum wage, what the hell are people with

part time minimum wage gonna do?

P.R.O.M.E.S.A. is a sham, but congress is pretty proud that they can do us

this "help"  without spending any taxpayer money.  After all it would be a

real tragedy to use your taxes to help millions of fellow Americans, some

of whom fought and died side by side with you on your wars.

The problem with Puerto Rico is not a spending problem. Our local

governments spent and borrowed unwisely, but that didn't cause the

problem. The problem is the backbone of our economy was taken away by a

congress, which now happily attempts to find the literal least they

could do.

So why am I telling you this? To guilt trip you or make you feel bad? No.

I'm telling you because there is still time to stop it. P.R.O.M.E.S.A is

going to the senate, and you can  still  call your senators and ask them

to stop it. We Puerto Ricans don't have any representation on the senate,

because if we did, I wouldn't have to write this kind of thing, but with

your help we can  turn things around.

We have to do something about the enormous debt we have. But it has to be

a good something. We can't afford to half ass and penny pinch our way to a

solution that has been building up for 100 years. You don't want to rush

up a bad idea, and end up bemoaning that "well, we had to do something.

Call or write your local senator and tell them to call off P.R.O.M.E.S.A.,

to help us restructure our debt, and to allow us to manage our economy.

That's all we want. We don't want to not pay the debt. We just want to pay

it at a reasonable pace, and without selling basic services and historicaly

 and environmentally valuable landmarks to hedge funds. Without putting our children through the fire for a debt they did not accrue.

We only ask that you try.

Top 5 reasons why Kim Kardashian should be President at 11:03 AM

So, I have been observing your "election primaries" with profound fascination. It's become increasingly clear this race is gonna be Hilary Clinton, former first lady, senator, and secretary of state, vs Donald Trump, wealthy businessman, hotel owner, and reality tv personality.

Now, on paper that seems a pretty easy choice.  And you're probably already readying  your fingers to blast me with a  "NO it's not! MY candidate is a much better choice".

Take it easy. I'm Puerto Rican, I can't vote. And if I could, I wouldn't choose Trump or Clinton. No, my candidate would be Kim Kardashian, of being Kim Kardashian fame. Why? Well...

5)She's an excellent businesswoman

"A video? Of SEX? On the Internet? WhAAAAA...?

Now, I hate that Kim Kardashian is famous. Because she isn't famous for doing stuff, or having talents or anything.  She's famous because she had sex with a guy on camera, in a grainy vid, the vid "escaped" and became public, and media fascination with this nobody having sex with basically a nobody being in the internet eventually lead to her making millions of dollars in merchandize.
But you can't deny it takes some kinda genius to pull that off. To make people to care about ass and titties on the internet, where asses and tits run wild and free, where you can find people doing just about anything,that's nothing short of amazing.

Even in the (very large) probability that the whole thing was staged to give her a shot at stardom, you gotta wonder how you do that. People all around the world  have their nudity leaked into the internet, and usually all they get is like, fired from their jobs or..demoted, or shamed. BUT she somehow used the very same scenario to ascend from what Sir Mix-A-Lot's "Baby Got Back" would accurately describe as "One of those Rap Guy's Girlfriend's" into a position of influence where millions of people want to hear what she would say, despite having not said a smart thing in all the time the public has seen her.


So obviously, such a skill would probably translate to the White House, one would assume. When it's time to make important financial or social decisions, you're gut  might be telling you that you want someone who knows fuck all about those issues, who has maybe studied them, the same way when hiring someone at a restaurant you want someone with experience, and not just someone who haggles with the waitresses all the time. But your deeper gut knows that the guy who haggles with the waitresses has been to, like, many restaurants, and therefore is the superior choice.

4) She speaks her mind

Such revelations.

If there's one thing we hate about politicians, is how much they smile. But if there's a second thing as well, it'd probably be the way they talk.  Always talking like saying the wrong thing could have consequences, just because saying the wrong thing could have consequences. We need someone who just blurts out whatever brainfarts are bubbling up their head box.

Luckily, Kim Kardashian, has a Twitter, which is a website dedicated exclusively dedicated to  putting such brainfarts on a voting booth and seeing which wins every day. And Kim Kardashian has millions of people who's willingly smell them, so I guess that means she's got opinions on stuff.
 
 



You see? President Kardashian won't stand ther hemming and hawing and saying "I won't say". She'll tell it like it is, which is how it probably works in international diplomacy. Is that how that works? I think it is: survival of the loudmouthiest.


3) She's got Karisma

Women like this woman. It's WEIRD.

Ok, let's be frank: America chose George W Bush over Al Gore(or maybe they didn't) because George was a more relatable, seemingly down to Earth candidate. That one of those went on to be one of the loudest voices against climate change and the other now can't be seen near some European  Countries  for fear of being tried for War Crimes  should really surprise no one.

America loves itself some dumb...as long as there's charisma involved. The idea that a candidate is smarter than them is a bit terrifying, when it should be "DUH".  You don't want teachers to be relatable to the kids, you want teachers to teach good!


Kimberly Kardashian is  probably a little smarter than what I give her credit for, if only because nobody can be that dumb without reverting back into a scarecrow. But she does have a certain je ne seis quoi(I mean really QUOI? QUOI DE FOUQ?) about her that make people like her way more than they should about series of sentient butt implants. It can't be sex appeal itself. When's the last time you heard people talk about Megan Fox's EX like he matters? Do you even know who that would be? You don't. You don't and he could be getting surgery to become a woman right now and nobody would care!

So it can talk pretty, it can look pretty, and  it is famous. Why not give it the chance to govern the nation?  America picked former actor Ronald Reagan as president, and he was so charismatic, most people still thing the biggest Contra scandal of the 80's was when their buddy stole their NES game.

2) Kim Kardashian is not a normal politician

This is a child that might be Kim Kardashian.

Politics are really confusing to most of us. It's almost a different world. There's thing in there, rules in there, spoken and unspoken, that do not exist anywhere else. It's like basketball, ,and all the people that are there are the All Stars of that sport, passing the ball in ways we didn't know balls could be passed.


We desperately wish it  was basic-er, and the one way we can try that, is putting the common man in the big seat. Candidates promise all the time they aren't those those types of regular politicians in ads and stuff, but by the time you get to be on ads, you probably aren't just Joe Cheesnack anymore.


But if you want a candidate that has known struggle, look no further than Kim Kardashian, who clawed her way from rags to riches.

The daughter of a mixed race family, Kim was just a humble, salt of the earth girl with dreams of making it big in the fashion business.   Like many of us, she too had to struggle and fuck her way to success. I'm not even being accusatory about that last part. In an ocean of "Rap Guy's Girlfriends" who want to make it big in the business, she's of the small, small percent who actually DOES make it big. She didn't suck a dick better or faster or more publicly than anyone. But unlike most people, she road that dick to the center of the world's stage. She pulled herself from her semen encrusted bootstraps into a person of worldly importance.

Isn't that the American Dream, that you can make it despite your setbacks, despite how unqualified you are? Kim Kardashian didn't inherit her success from a wealthy family.  She's got more in common with most people than Donald Trump.




1) Kim Kardashian has haters

"Girls, if you give it up to every Z list celeb you encounter, you too can be rich as fuck!"

It might seem a weird reason to pick someone for leader of anything. I mean, in essence, all politicians have haters, detractors, and all sorts of opposers.

But Kim Kardashian is different. She doesn't have haters  because of her beliefs, or because of her political inclinations. Kim Kardashian has haters because "Kim Kardashian shouldn't be".

I mean, I know I hate her because of that.  Like Neo, in the Matrix, she's an anomaly that proves disturbing to the world. Who loves Kim Kardashian, and why? Who buys her game? Who wants to smell like the smell that the box that has her name? And why?

It is a mystery, and mystery's are interesting. Fascination breeds fascination. Are people talking about her because the media is guiding them to? Or is the media talking about her because the people demand it? Is it a weird vicious circle of demand and supply to know more about a woman who might as well be a dry coconut with a great big rump?

And sure, that's no real reason to choose someone to lead a parade, let alone a world super power. That's superficial fluff, and doesn't really go into the contents of what her policies would be, what her standing is on issues, how she would react under the enormous pressure  that such a position would entail. But clearly we're way past the age when those are the things that matter in an American leader.  We're at a different age now. It's an age where I guess "traditional politics" is taking a backseat to "stupid media shit" when it comes to priorities in a leader. So why not pick a candidate who is the MOST stupid-media-shittiest?

Because it's a bad idea?

15 Questions about #Gamergate at 1:54 PM



THE SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT BATTLE OF HISTORY!

 I'm hoping that by the time I publish this, it's subject matter will no longer exist. I'm sort of a late adopter, and I mostly sat out of the whole ruckus of Gamergate.

From the beginning I had my doubts. I couldn't muster any anger about some lady doing some sex things to some people from some sites  I didn't even frequent. I haven't had a console in roughly 4 years. Money problems is all.  And really, the whole thing where there where so many accussations and counter accusations...I wrote like 3 articles about it I never posted because it hardly felt right. Even the one I did post kind of makes me feel a little stupid, in retrospect.

But in that time I also watched. Gamergate was not about the pretty blond lady who made a text game, or the lady dressed as a sultry lumberjack, it's members said. They claimed that the media had them figured all wrong, and if we only listened. 

But if I don't assume Gamergate is about what it absolutely looks like it's about, by all the evidence and, frankly with most of it's supporters replies on Facebook (it rhymes with Shmarassment of Shwomen, and Shmear of Shmeminism), then I have to ask a question or 15 of them. Speak now, Gators. I will listen.

15. Why don't you harass men more?

I mean, yeah, not ALL the Gamergators or whatever, threaten women with death and rape. Some threaten some men, too. But...there's a disproportionate amount of hate towards females, who, like Leigh Alexander, aren't even being extreme: they're just disavowing the harassment.

This threats make you look bad and sexist. You should be equal opportunity harassers and harass some men. It's not like there's a shortage of men that disagree with your opinions.

People of all genders and creeds agree that Gamergate is just a bunch of idiots from 4Chan out to spook women for laughts. Won't you prove them wrong?


14. What are you gonna do when games grow up?

I mean, clearly, games are becoming more of an expression form. While the first 3 decades where spent mostly with the commercialist doldrums of selling children and young adults entertainment, they are now enjoyed all over the world as more than mere entertainment.

Gamergate is clearly here to stay for many years to come. It has all the components of a long lasting cultural faction. When we start seeing, as I suspect we will, more games made by minorities and women, games that are not only not adventures, but that aren't even violent at all...what are you gonna do?

But you are against such "political ideas" even being discussed. Naturally gamergate, as an addendum to gamer culture, needs to evolve WITH games, to recognize all kinds of ideas  can have a place. As much  as GG may gripe about their ar and it's users being put on the spot, it also has to recognize that this is still a young medium, ripe for growing.

15 years ago I'd have told you a game about a lawyer is a stupid idea. What's he gonna do, shoot laws at the enemies he comes across? And yet, they did it. One day, the lawyer might not even have to make his enemies explode!



"Your move, Richard Gear."

One day, all I'm saying is, criticism of games is gonna come in the form of a  game. And that day, GG will have to decide if it can take the contradiction.

13. What's up with all the stuff that didn't turn out to be true?

Your movement started with a bunch of trumped up charges against a lady that...I'm not gonna say you lied. You may have acted on unconfirmed information sound better to you?

I mean, if you think this is something so serious that 1000s from all over the globe need to get together....shouldn't your information be fully confirmed?

If I were you, and all the stuff  I'd said had been a full on not truth, and my achievements on It had been enabling a bunch of troglodytes to dox two citizens of the United States of America...well I'd have disbanded the movement right there. Any good you could maybe get done is already tarnished.

But maybe this whole "getting magazines to always tell you who their friends are" thing is bigger than all of us.

12. Why do you think your movement attracts such negative attention?


I did stab them! My view points are valid!

I understand that not all gamergatees are involved in the threatening of women. Some of them  even constantly remind us. But why does the media continue to focus on all the misogynists who happen to have attached themselves to your cause?

I don't know why you don't attract more people who aren't interested in Zoe Quinn's sexual escapades. Who WOULDN'T want to join the rough and tumble  world of telling magazines what their content should be? It's a universal thing.

But for some reason, people who join you are  very often, well...not misogynists, just...currently engaged in the production and distribution of  misogyny. You should do stuff that makes those people not want to join Gamergate.

11. You guys know a gamergate is an antclass, right?

I know, somebody must have said this. But I love me some bugs!



CHIIIIICK FIIIIGHT!

10. What is a Social Justice Warrior?

I'm asking, because I see the term bandied about a lot, and I'm still not sure what it means. All I imagine is an old 80s cartoon intro with  synthesizer music, or maybe  a crossover between Conan and Martin Luther King.



BY CROM! YOU ARE ALL SO UNDERREPRESENTED!

Is it anyone who thinks the depiction of women is important? Or does it have to do with  how much influence that person has.

Anita Sarkeesian, for example, wielded zero influence in videogames until she started getting harassed. Now, I know  a lot of you feel that this harassment never happened, and neither did the harassment of 9 whole people whose harassment is atributted to your group.

Is the guy who's bothered that Chris Redfield is gunning down African all over the place a Social Justice Warrior? If I say you are misogynists, does that make me a Social Justice Warrior?

I mean, I may very well be. I've written about how I agree with Sarkeesian on somethings, I also disagreed with feminists with their criticism of Skullgirls and  The Princess and the Bow(later Brave)


I either ran over her cat, or she doesn't like the way I play Rumble Roses.

I find extremes extremely tedious. Sometimes I agree with a person, but disagree with a method. For example, if you where to make a video saying you want video game journalists to be fair, I'd probably agree with that sentiment. But If your video says 5 times in as many minutes that you "don't care" if some lady had sexy times with some people, I'd probably tell you to take your bochinche trick ass  out of my eyes.


9. Could you guys create your own website?

Who am I kidding, of course you could! Being angry at publications is how most publications start! In your own website (IS GAMERGATE.COM TAKEN?)  you could have all the ethics you want, free of charge. You guys could follow kosher  law for all the world cares!

In fact, besides reviewing games and not colluding with anything, you could also be  investigating all that corruption. I mean, the movement so far is just a series of hashtags and defenses of what the movement is about. Why not go solid?


8. Why did your group donate money for a women's game making thing?

One of the allegations  you point out in your defense of why you're not a mysogiball is that you donated several thousand dollars to a  something to do with  women making games. Why?

I don't mean to be suspicious or anything, but your movement is two months old, and no friends of political correctness, as per most of the GG posts I've seen. Why, in the middle of all that, would it come up to say "let's donate money to a womanly cause"? That...doesn't even have anything to do with the ethics in journalism or whatever. What is the reason for this donation? It really looks, from an outsider's point of view, that you did it to further a case against Zoe Quinn.


7. Are you aware that there is no movement against Gamergate?

It's true. Whereas we know Gamergate has it's on little conclaves, and you guys go on there and talk about stuff, people who are against the movement because of stuff it seems to have done are even less unified. However, the difference is they all agree on several key points.

Harassing women is a terrible thing.

 

Gamergate seems specifically born out of a mentality that leads to women getting harassed.

 

Gamergate overall seems like a bad thing that needs to end.

So whereas GG alternates between complaining about journalism, women, social justice warriors, and such,  all your opponents need to do is point out what the results of your movement have been, and that's it.

Find something you all agree on,  a goal make it specific, and not about a private person having sex.

6. Do you guys have any female family?

Wait, don't answer this one. Anonimity and facelessness are key to your movement. I have a handful of sisters, and my mother's still alive. I have several cousins.

You see, sometimes, I'm playing my videogames or reading about them, and they need me. Sometimes they're hurt. Sometimes they have problems.


"I love you, but if you mess with people's videogames, you on you own, ma"

If they where getting death threats and having their personal shit spread all over the web, I'd be livid. I know for sure, whatever happens in the videogame world would just drop out of my priorities.

I dunno. Maybe that's just me. Maybe there's a mental space where threatening someone with rape is an appropriate response to videogame shit. I've never been there. I'd never even associate with people who do that, you know? Even if we agree that the pie sucks, I would not hang out with someone who feels that the only response to Obamacare is to bomb the hospital.



5. What changes, specifically, have SJWs/Feminists, brought to videogames that make them such a target for Gamergate?

I mean, I could get behind the idea that these people are making videogames too PC...but I'd need to see them successfully achieve that, first.

Now, don't misunderstand me, I'm a big old horndog. But if you want to know who's really making your games PC, you should look  at the lower part of the box.

That little letter right there decides if your game can be sold to the public at large in a brick and mortar store.  The ESRB makes, and has been deciding which content is "street acceptable" and which isn't. Everything over the M mark is basically not accepted.


Thanks for the heads up.

These guys, under the behest of the ESA, gaming's own special interest lobby(and you guys saying you don't want politics in gaming), are the reason more games don't actually  show you what's under the boob-shaped armor.  Formed in 1993, as a way to avoid the government enforcing it's own arbitrary forms of censorship, the ESRB has taken more boobs off of the screen than Anita Sarkeesian could see without bursting into tears of blood.

Now, we could try to get rid of the ESRB. That'd be nice, wouldn't it. It's not the 90's anymore, daddy: you can know what's in your kid's game with a single Let's Play. The comics industry blew off IT's ratings system, and it's fine.

 But maybe that's too specific for  Gamergate, huh?


4. Why not just not go to the offending websites?

You call this a consumer's revolt/revolution. You want these sites to give it to you straight, and without any corruption or thinkpieces about gaming as anything other than periodically delivered commercial entertainment.

But...why not just not go to those sites? Aren't there any other sites that can satisfy your needs? Frankly, I'm not much of a Kotaku or Escapist fan, or IGN visitor, and that suits me fine. I go somewhere else.

3.Actually, have you guys considered leaving reviews altogether?

I mean, really, buying games based on reviews is for the birds. This is the part of the industry I feel would MOST be at risk from the kind of corruption you pay lip service to. Instead of demanding THESE websites give you fair reviews, how about FUCK reviews, I'll find out by my own damn self if the game is worth it. There's demos, there's rentals. There's even illegal downloads. Why take the long ass road of changing a bunch of sites?

2. Is Gamergate just a bunch of disgruntled people just being disgruntled?


Seriously, there's so many people in our gang. We're mostly good, but invariably some of them are gonna be bad.

I mean, gee, I don't know. I know these movement things can be pretty fluid and stuff, but It seems like this group is just vaguely aiming at the concept that videogame corruption is bad and then...continuing to aim.

Like, what DO you want? Should the president of Kotaku resign? Do you want Anita Sarkeesian to apologize to you for saying something you don't agree with?  What suits you?

The notion that these people have wronged you, somehow, can only take the movement SO far. At this point, you should at least have one of the companies you think is in corruption with specific demands. Not specific like "Let us know if you're fucking someone in the industry." Specific like "Nixon planned that espionage. Impeach Mode!"

1. Uncover any scandals that don't have to do with SJWs, Feminism, or anything like that, yet?

You can always tell a tree from it's fruit. Gourd trees give you gourds, pear trees give you peers, and pine cones give you Chris Pines, I assume.

So if Gamergate is a movement hell bent on bringing more ethics to videogames, surely it has something more than some ladies disagreeing with them to worry about. I mean, you've been at this for MONTHS. I expect you to have cracked this case by now.